Off to a Good Start

Well, I managed to wake up at 5:40 this morning, which for me is early. I admit it, I've been spoiled by working from home. It's really nice to be able to roll out of bed at 6:30 or so, grab breakfast and hop onto the computer to start work for 7 am. 

Last night I made a schedule of sorts to follow throughout the day. It's more so I can plan things out better and try to set specific times for things like homework and bedtime. I'm happy to say I managed to get a few things done this morning. I straightened up the kitchen, made breakfast and coffee, set the kids breakfast up and read my bible.

This morning I read John 15-16. I just wanted to share with you the verses that stood out for me from John 15: 

 

⁹"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.  

¹²My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 

 ¹⁷This is my command: Love each other.

¹⁹If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. 

I blogged last night about how I haven't been very faithful lately and that I wanted to start sharing that part of my life. I believe that's why those verses held so much meaning for me today. I've been watching TV shows and listening to music that isn't exactly good for the soul. I find myself disturbed by some of it so why am I watching or listening to it? To fit in? To follow the world? I've got to do what's right for me and what's healthy for my life. I've just been taking my sweet time to get to this point. I love to fight change and then wonder why it took me so long.

That being said I'm not quite there with the subject of tattoos. I'm sure a lot of my friends don't understand, but for me right now it's a form of expression. I think maybe that sounds cliche, but then again there's a reason things become cliche....cuz they're true. So, my latest tattoo is from a sundial I took a picture of at the Botanical Gardens. It's on my left forearm. 

On another note, I kind of took a week off exercising and tracking calories. Last Monday I injured my wrist while biking. I'm still not sure exactly what happened, but I guess I put too much pressure on the right side of my right wrist.  It still hurts today, but not nearly as much as it did  last week. So, today I am back to tracking my calories and I'm hoping the weather holds up so I can get in a bike ride this afternoon. 

I think I'm about done for now. I may post again today if i get the chance. I've been meaning to start reviewing other blogs. I guess I should pick a day of the week to do this...

 

Me: "Sonia, pick a day of the week..."

Sonia: "lol uhmmmm Friday?"

Done. So, stay tuned dear blog readers this Friday will be my first blog review. (Please be gentle.) I'll leave you with one of my favorite songs right now:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uyv1jUDLY3s

The Little Things

Image by horizontal.integration via FlickrHello my dear blog readers. It's been a long time. I've been busy living life! Isn't that an amazing idea? To live life?

Well, it's been a long hard road but I feel as though I've come so far in this past year. That I've grown so much. I don't know how to explain it other than I feel like I got my groove back, but it's more than that. It's as though I never had a groove and I'm just getting it for the first time. Does that make sense to anyone but me?

It's the little things.

Things like buying a pair of heels that are actually stylish. Or how I love Starbucks so much the locals know me by name. Or how I love driving and my husband makes fun of me for feeling the Gs. For the record I don't speed I just accelerate quickly. =)

I'm trying new things like drawing and painting with water colors. I'm thinking I may eventually even take a class. I've really started  to enjoy biking. Rather I've rediscovered my love of biking. I bought a speedometer and found that I have a competitive streak. I love knowing how fast I'm going and beating my previous speeds even if it's only for a few seconds.

I've lost 6 lbs since August 7th. I found a new application for my HTC Magic. It's amazing. My Fitness Pal (MFP) is so much easier to use than the Fat Secret application I attempted to use previously. Don't get me wrong Fat Secret is great, but it just wasn't right for me. It works so well that I've consistently been tracking calories for 15 days. Don’t get me wrong just because I've been tracking doesn’t necessarily mean I've stayed within my calories for the day, but I'm on my way. Sometimes it's all about the right tools that work for you where you are in your life now. 

It's the little things.

Like I binged the other day but I only ate half the container of Haagen Dazs Rocky Road and I've always finished it before. I know it's not a huge step but it is a step in the right direction.

I met with a friend of mine last week. Heather and I haven't physically seen each other in 6 years. We went to high school and both moved the summer after grade 10. We've kept in touch over the years. 

We spent 3 hours in a coffee shop talking as though we'd never spent time apart. It's amazing how some friendships are like that. That’s the mark of a true friendship.

Well, at the end of our visit she mentioned how much I've changed over the years. How I'm so much more confident in my own skin than I ever was before. Amazing how one comment can open your eyes to see those changes. Obviously, I'm not perfect and I have a lot of growing to do in other ways, but it's amazing to just BE ME!

Wow! It's amazing how writing a blag can bring on revelations about oneself. I was just reminded of my trip  in February to Circle Square Ranch for a Christian women's retreat. When I was had prayed for God to give me 2 words. Well I got a phrase… Be Still and Wait Patiently. Here's an exerpt from my blog about the retreat:

Two Words
When Heidi started the first session she talked about her two words from God. Each year almost like a New Years Resolution, she prays for God to give her two words. Sometimes its a word or two and other times it may be a phrase or bible passage. I prayed for two words for my weekend and in the stillness of the morning I found the words: Be Still and Wait Patiently. This is not something I do well. I find it difficult to sit quietly. When I read those words from Psalm 37 I knew it was a message God wanted me to hear.

While I knew the phrase struck a chord with me, I wasn't entirely sure why. Is this what I've been waiting for? To be still and wait patiently to be me? To be able to just BE in my own skin?

It's the little things.

Hi! I'm Elle! It's nice to meet me! For the first time in my life I am truly happy to be me.

It's the little things... 

The Race Is On

Well,Wednesday night was our annual GEMS and Cadets Pine Car Races. Each of the kids designs their own car and then everyone gets together and races. This is always a huge event, lots of people and so much excitement.

I let my husband go out, so my mother in law came with the kids and I. She took care of Riley while Dale and Joey played with their cars and friends. At one point my mum in law took Riley outside for a walk...I should be more specific...Riley took her Nana for a long walk! Apparently, it took a while to coax her back toward the church.

I had a great time announcing the racers of each race. It's funny because I was always afraid of public speaking and now you can't shut me up!

The night dragged a bit near the end with the last of the heat races. Finally it was time for the awards to be announced. Dale won 3rd place for the Best Looking Car on the boys side. We didn't stay past this as it was already 9:30! 

All in all a good time was had by all. Oh, I forgot to mention my pink car that looked a little like a phone receiver was probably the slowest car on the track! How embarrassing! Ah but it was all in good fun!

Here are some of the pictures:

Here's the beginning of the track

My boys, Dale and Joey, hamming it up

Here's Riley. Look at all that hair? Isn't she adorable?

Dale receiving his trophy for 3rd Place - Best Looking Car

Joey misappropriated Counselor Ron's jeep. I'm pretty sure he was only supposed to have it for the races. 

Dale with his car and trophy

Stumbling Through Life

As many of you know I am a GEMS counselor. The purpose of GEMS Girls' Clubs is to help bring girls into a living, dynamic relationship with Jesus Christ. 

This year's season is quickly winding down and I didn't have anything planned. From time to time winging it seems to really pay off. I quickly put together a few activities from one of our resources and I think I managed to provide a powerful message. 

The main  activity we did was to be blindfolded and maneuver through an obstacle course of chairs to get the ball on the other side. The idea was to show the girls that when we try to do things on our own we often stumble and fall. When we take the time to listen to God and follow the path he has laid out for us we often get exactly what we need.  

Each of the girls took a turn and at the end I decided I should go through as well. While blindfolded the girls decided to use my phone to take a video. The quality isn't great, and please keep in mind that I didn't know I was being recorded.

I think it really helped the girls and myself to tangibly see or rather feel how difficult it is to navigate through life. Even though we cannot always see the path, if we take the time to listen to God he will always steer us in the right direction.

Dignity

I'd like to talk to you about something a little different today. I know the bible says to give in secret, but I want to share something with you.

There is a woman who sits on Metcalfe St in Ottawa. Her name is Mo. She's not homeless per se, but her life is on the streets. I can't explain why, but I feel drawn to her. I used to walk by her everyday when I worked at on Elgin St and I started bringing her coffee and a muffin or bagel. I've stopped to have real conversations with her.

I haven't been by to see her in a long time, between running late and working from home, but I think of her often. This morning I was early for work and went to see her. She still remembers me and even though I can smell the booze on her breath, I care.

We talked this morning, she's sick again. You see a lot of people walk by her and ignore her. People with a cold or the flu walk by her and cough on her. How hard is it to turn your head toward the street instead of the woman sitting on the sidewalk?

I've sat with her, I've hugged her when she cried and I still can't explain why she touches me so. I have to hope that it's some sort of call from God and have faith that I'm making some sort of small difference in her life, even if it's not often.

I admit I don't feel the same about every person I see on the street and maybe I should. I do try to acknowledge their existence. I remember we had a speaker at our church who said even if you can't give them money just give them the dignity of looking them in the eye. I've kept that with me and I try to at least smile and say hello.

Hear, O LORD, and answer me,
for I am poor and needy.
Guard my life, for I am devoted to you.
You are my God; save your servant
who trusts in you.
Have mercy on me, O Lord,
for I call to you all day long.
Psalm 86:1-3

Day 2 - Completed

Good evening! Well, I didn't think I'd make it. Every time I decided that's it I'm going to go I procrastinated or something came up with the kids. Finally, Ben all but kicked me out of the house and told me to just go. So, I did and I feel so much better too! I was all grumpy before I went but now I feel great.

I ran for about 6 minutes total because my shins and feet were hurting badly. I`m going to have a look at New Balance this weekend to see if I can pick up a new pair of runners. I went to the New Balance website and did their Total Fit Test. I think I found a pair of shoes.The price is right and their pretty!!

Day 2: Here's your workout for today: Start with a 5-10 minute warm-up walk. Run 1/1 x 10. (Run 1 minute, walk 1 minute, ten times, for a total of 20 minutes.) Finish with a 5-10 minute cool-down walk. This is the same workout you did yesterday, so you can definitely do it!

Trackname:
Date:	Wednesday Mar. 17, 2010 18:58 pm
Distance:	1.92 mi
Duration:	00:30:32
Exercise Type:	Running

Day 1 - Completed!

Completed Day 1: Let's Get Started

Today's run: Start with a 5-10 minute warm-up walk. Run 1/1 x 10. (Run 1 minute, walk 1 minute, ten times, for a total of 20 minutes.) Finish up with a 5-10 minute cool-down walk. Remember to take it easy and don't worry about your pace at all.

Okay, so in reality I walked for 10, ran 1 minute, walked 1 minute for 10 minutes and then walked for the rest which ended up being another 17 minutes. My lower back really hurt, but I endured. I'm sure tomorrow I'll be able to do a little more. For now I'm just excited that I set out to get out there and I actually did it!

Trackname:	Day 1
Date:	Tuesday Mar. 16, 2010 15:46 pm
Distance:	2.4 mi
Duration:	00:37:29
Exercise Type:	Walking (with a little running)

Spring has Sprung!

Hello Spring! How I've missed you!

Isn't it wonderful? The days are brighter, the weather is warmer, the snow is almost gone and it hasn't even been slushy! Can you believe it's already the middle of March?! It feels like waking up from the darkness of despair and coming out into the light of life!

With the nice weather comes the urge to get out and get some exercise. Last night we all went for a walk after

dinner. It wasn't a very fast walk or very far but it was nice to be outside and spend time together as a family.

This weekend was super productive, I realize now I must have been spring cleaning without meaning to. We've had a lot of trouble getting Riley to sleep over the past month. Seems to be since she got sick in February first with the flu then with a cold. It got to the point even if she woke in the middle of the night she refused to go back to bed.

Friday night was bad, I thought I'd finally worked out a new routine with her, but she woke at 3 am and started freaking out when I wanted her to go back to sleep. It was then I realized the real problem and that's the neighbors. They're young and were having a party. It wasn't a loud party by any real standards, but Riley's room is right above the front door. So, Saturday I set out to switch Riley's room with my office and she's slept well ever since! She loves her new room and even plays in it. In the process I organized my office which in itself is HUGE!

Well, as you know it's March. October is only 7 months away. That means I've got 7 months to get in shape for the CIBC Run for the Cure 2010! Check out my donation page. I'm not sure when they switch everything over to a new year, but I'm already preparing. So, to get started I'm going to follow an About.com program 3 Weeks to a 30-Minute Running Habit.

Day 1: Let's Get Started

Today's run: Start with a 5-10 minute warm-up walk. Run 1/1 x 10. (Run 1 minute, walk 1 minute, ten times, for a total of 20 minutes.) Finish up with a 5-10 minute cool-down walk. Remember to take it easy and don't worry about your pace at all.

I'll let you know how it goes!

February Women's Retreat

When I started this new blog I said I would update with more then just my weight loss progress and I haven't really done that. I've been too ashamed to write anything because I've hit the winter blues. I'm not going to go into more than that because I want to tell you about an amazing experience I had in February!

Thanks to the church grapevine and my wonderful husband, I was lucky enough to have the opportunity for a weekend away. Eight women from Barrhaven Fellowship CRC, including myself, went on a Women's Retreat at Circle Square Ranch in Arden, ON.

We met at the church Friday afternoon, packed our gear and with four women in each vehicle started our journey. We arrived right on time and quickly got ourselves settled into the Bakery. The hot water was only working on the boys side of the ranch and let me tell you it smelled like a boys bathroom!Our room consisted of 6 bunk beds with these vinyl mattresses. I quickly realized that on our list of things to bring bedding meant more than just a pillow and blanket. It was a major "DUH!" moment. Thankfully, Andrea brought lots of extra stuff and let me borrow a blanket to sleep on.

Then we were off to our first session of Heartsongs and Chocolates with Heidi McLaughlin. The whole weekend was powerful and amazing but I'm just going to talk about a few things that really stood out for me.

Theme Verse
We had a theme verse for the weekend that we committed to memory. Our theme verse for the weekend:

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him, but God has revealed it to us by His Spirit

1 Corinthians 2:9-10

Two Words
When Heidi started the first session she talked about her two words from God. Each year almost like a New Years Resolution, she prays for God to give her two words. Sometimes its a word or two and other times it may be a phrase or bible passage. I prayed for two words for my weekend and in the stillness of the morning I found the words: Be Still and Wait Patiently. This is not something I do well. I find it difficult to sit quietly. When I read those words from Psalm 37 I knew it was a message God wanted me to hear. In fact, writing this a month later I realize I STILL need to put that into practice.

Mask of Shame

Shame is an excruciating and punishing awareness of our human inadequacy.

We all hide behind different masks and underneath those masks are feelings of shame. There are two types of shame. Real shame when we've done something that we know was wrong but we can take to God and he'll forgive us. Circumstantial shame is a feeling of being wrong. That there is something wrong with us.

If you're anything like me my shame makes me feel as though I'm not good enough or that I'm not worthy. For this session, Heidi had us all put on masquerade masks. There are so many things that we've already gone through and asked for forgiveness but we allow the shame to creep back for things that are in the past and should remain in the past.

At the end she asked us when we were ready to all take off our masks and let the shame go. It was really hard for a lot of women to walk up to the front and drop their masks. Heidi was waiting to give each one of us a hug at that pivotal moment. It's a moment I won't soon forget, but also have to keep reminding myself when the shame creeps back that I've asked forgiveness and let it go.

Triple Braided Heart Connections (You, God and Each Other)
God tugs at our heartstrings through His Spirit. We need each of the following heart connections to thrive in life.

1. Magnum Opus: We all need to see ourselves as God's Masterpiece.

2. Your 2 a.m. Friend: Who would you call at 2 am? Who is that person you can be a complete mess with that would lay in bed with you when you could do nothing else?

3. God: In the end there is just you and God.

The Healing at the Pool

Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for a feast of the Jews. Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, "Do you want to get well?"

"Sir," the invalid replied, "I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me."

Then Jesus said to him, "Get up! Pick up your mat and walk."

John 5:1-8

Heidi had us read this story and asked us what strange question does Jesus ask: Do you want to get well?

So many of us are comfortable in our misery because it's what we know. Personally, I'm comfortable in my misery of being overweight. Why? Because change is hard! I'm not happy being overweight but it takes work, hard work. It's not as simple as going on a diet and following some strict guidelines. Often, we have to dig through emotions that we don't want to deal with or even acknowledge.