Date Night...

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Are you married or in a serious relationship? Do you have kids? Remember the good ole days when you could just go out whenever you wanted? Now that my kids are a little older and thanks to a wonderful friend my husband and I finally get to go out together. 

At first, we'd go out and be home after about an hour. Other times we didn't plan for the evening and ended just driving around. 

Well, I think we're finally getting used to date night. Tonight, we had money, we went out for dinner and went shopping. We stayed out for about 3 hours! We got home and the kids were asleep! It was so nice to NOT have to put them to bed. 

It's surprising how difficult it can be to get back that part of your relationship. The part where you go out together without the kids and you have to have a conversation that isn't interrupted by the kids. That's not to say my husband and I never talk. It's just different! 

I highly recommend date night and it doesn't have to end up a disaster like in the movie Date Night. 

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Things I Wish I'd Known 2 Months Ago

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Birthday Parties....I have come to dread them - or at least the ones I have to plan for my kids! (I still LOVE planning my own ;) which is coming up in a few months!!)

I have three wonderful children and of course I love doing things that make them happy, but their birthdays are all fairly close together. My middle child, Joey, turned 6 this year. His party was first because he's in June. I think I did a decent job of planning his party. I planned ahead, made some of my own decorations and enlisted a few helpers. The party was a success, although very chaotic since we had more kids than anticipated. You see we're really close with our neighbors. So close, in fact, we ended up with a bunch of the neighborhood kids at the party. I think we had 13 or 14 kids at one point...in...my...house. I barbecued for all the kids and the adults. By the time the party was over I was exhausted.  

Thankfully Dale, my oldest, has his birthday at the beginning of August, so I figured there was lots of time. Unfortunately, I was not as prepared for Dale's birthday. Due to scheduling issues we had to have his party on July 30th. I decided, hey let's do the same thing as Joey's party - let's have a barbecue...you know because it was such a hit and not exhausting at ALL... Well, I managed to do the invitations and order the cake (last minute) and set the party time an hour less than Joey's. Well, again...we're really close with our neighbors...and I could see it was going to be another huge party. So, I opted for finding as many lawn chairs as possible and we "mostly" stayed out of my house. Unfortunately, I do not have a patio table - I'm sure you can imagine the issue with having the food/drink stuff inside while all the kids are outside. At least they weren't all piled into my house at the same time. I did have help which I'm so thankful for. I think the party was successful, but I was left exhausted and with a disastrous kitchen.

Fast forward a couple of weeks to this past weekend...my youngest, Riley, turned 4 on Friday. (I can't believe my baby is 4!) I started off with the best intentions (don't we all) but in the end I didn't even get around to invitations. Since, one of my daughter's friends wasn't going to be at the party we decided to have a picnic on her actual birthday. I have to say the picnic was more enjoyable than the party, but I think I put more effort into the picnic. I didn't really mean to, but that's just the way it happened. Her party was Saturday and two of her friends came over. It was small and inside the house, but I think she still had a good birthday.

So, here's the thing...I want to do better next year. Throwing three birthdays so close together is exhausting. I'm thinking the thing to do is plan them all when I plan Joey's. Obviously, I'm not going to purchase everything at that time. I think the planning will need to be done at the same time while I still have energy and motivation to plan. Of course, after all the parties are done I come across a Martha Stewart Party Planner 101! Really? Why couldn't I have found that 2 months ago?

Next year I'm going to look into the cost of having the parties somewhere that's not my house. The party is exhausting on it's own, let alone the cleanup after. Or maybe I'll hire someone to clean my kitchen....sigh...a girl can dream. 

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Dog Days of Summer

Image by Today is a good day via Flickr

Welcome to a new week of Being Elle. I'm taking on a new format this week, so please bear with me as I work out the bugs (aka my head). Each post will have a theme depending on which day of the week it is. Monday's will be either parenting or PMDD. As life would have it, today's post is on parenting.

We celebrated my eldest son's 9th birthday on Saturday. The last two weeks he's been at his dad's during the weekdays. I honestly didn't think I'd have a problem with it, but the reality of him not being here every day has turned me into an emotional wreck. He's gone for one more week and then life will get back to normal. 

For the last 4 years I've been working full time and my husband has been the stay at home parent. My contract ended mid-February and I've been at home since. My husband re-entered the workforce (quite successfully) about 2 months ago. I was quite excited to have the summer off and spend time with the kids. 

Well, summer is half over and I had a complete melt down this morning. As my husband so kindly pointed out to me, this is the first time I've been at home full time with the kids (other than maternity leave). It's challenging to work full time and come home to take over...but it's so much more difficult being home 24/7, especially during the summer. We have no set schedule, the kids want to be outside ALL the time...who knew one could get sick of being outside?! Sure, I have a nice tan, but nothing gets done in the house. How do people do it? Really, I'm asking...how do you do it?

The other problem I'm facing with my kids is all the fighting. I'm an only child so I really don't understand the sibling dynamic. I have three kids - ages 9, 6, and 4. I've been told by friends that it's just normal, but  how do you manage your kids fighting? I'd love to hear how you cope with your kids fighting, please leave a comment below or message me directly. 

Have a good night and stay tuned for Training Tuesday!

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Vlog Attempt #2

Good evening. Last night I went downstairs to workout and was really uncomfortable. I'm alone this week as my husband is away. The kids were in bed and I was worried I wouldn't hear them so I opted out. However, I made a point of working out before supper. It helped workout some of my frustrations from the day too and as always I am left wondering why I ever stop working out when it leaves me feeling great! 

Today's workout: Upper Body and a little Cardio - 40 minutes burned 308 calories

My kids are in bed and it's been a very very long day. I'm going to go relax now...I think I've earned it. Man, I can't wait until my husband is home! 

The Guilt Within

Cover of The Crazies

Why is it as parents, as human beings we feel guilty over everything?! I know I can't trust my emotions right now, that I'm in full PMDD swing, but it all starts somewhere doesn't it? I mean really the reasons I get upset are valid it's my overreaction to everything that's not. 

So here it is...I feel like I'm this monster of a mom and while I know right now I'm overreacting I also know that I'm right. The television is my substitute. This week I can't be in the same room as my kids for long without something setting me off. I gave the kids a bath tonight and when the boys ignored my request for them to turn around and face me so I could wash their hair I yelled. Literally hurting my throat trying to get their attention. So valid in that the kids were ignoring me but my overreaction was totally not valid. Herein-lies the problem of my monster within. 

How do people do it? When they get really stressed out? How do they cope with still having to get through the day to day stuff? How does one calmly put her kids to bed without screaming at the top of her lungs? I miss being able to sing to them and say good night.

Guilt is everywhere. From little things like spending any money on something just for yourself, putting aside a friend you're too busy to see, procrastinating at all those little things that need to get done, to the big stuff like going on a trip and leaving the kids with your spouse. A lot of people have guilt over the past and can't let it go. Or guilt for the future. Guilt is everywhere. 

With PMDD I have the extra guilt from when my emotions get out of control and I snap. Today is one of those days. I've started calling days like today the crazies, as in it's just the crazies or the crazies have me.

With all of this I know what most of you are thinking, why don't you go see your doctor? Well, I tried in September. I called the doctor but it was going to take over a month to see him. Finally in December I find a new doctor and go see him. When I told him about the PMDD he rolled his eyes! I know he's a man, but really?! Then I went back to ignoring the problem. Well, as things have been steadily getting worse I knew I needed to go to the doctor. I called my original doctor to find out Hey he's no longer practicing! So, my mum-in-law went to see her doc recently (a FEMALE doctor!) and she asked her to take me on. The doctor agreed and I have an appointment June 7th. Wish me luck! I'm going to talk to her about many things, the main one being PMDD.

I often joke that I need a break from my kids. I came to a realization tonight. The truth of the matter is that I don't need a break from the kids what I really need is a break from myself. With that thought, I'm off to have a nice long shower and then watch this weeks episode of Glee.

Toes

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So, last night I'm getting my kids ready for bed and throwing all the dirty clothes in the laundry room. I went to turn around and leave the kids bathroom when I caught my pinky toe on the bathroom door. After the initial blinding pain was over and I'd managed to sit down I looked at my toe. I then looked at my other toe to compare because the one I stubbed on the door looked funny.

Then I got creeped out because I was sure the toe was broken - my pinky toe was pointing in a way it shouldn't. As I tried NOT to look at my toe and tried to "walk it off" I realized this was more painful than the other times I've severely bruised my stupid pinky toe.

I had my son go get the phone so I could call my husband - poor guy rarely goes out and I call him home. Then I proceeded to put the boys to bed while hoping on one foot. Crawled up two flights of stairs and put Riley to bed too. Luckily they all went down without a fuss. Ben stopped at his parents and picked up his mom. My mother in law Kathy took me to emerg while Ben stayed home with the kids.

I hopped into the emerg and eventually ended up in a wheel chair because according to the nurse "X-Ray is too many hops". We waited a lot which I expected since a broken toe isn't really an emergency. Eventually we saw the doc and she showed me my X-Ray. My toe was dislocated with a possible fracture. So, she proceeds to tell me there are two ways of doing this. One is to have two needles stuck into my foot to numb the area first. The other is grin and bear it while she pops it back in place. I'm like let's just get it done and over with. (The idea of the needles creeped me out.)

So, doc takes me into an observation room and tells me to hold onto something and proceeds to pop my toe back in place and then tape them up. Then it was back to X-Ray to make sure it was back in place and straight.

Sure enough everything is back in place and I got to see the X-Ray to prove it. Also, since this one shows another angle we see that my toe is in fact broken, but not badly. Treatment is the same either way. Keep the toe taped up and it should heal in 3-4 weeks.

Kathy went to get the car and here was the real test...putting pressure on it for the first time since it was popped back in place and tapped. What's this? I CAN WALK! The poor guy with the leg in a brace must have thought I was crazy! In total we were only at the hospital for 3 hours which considering my toe is now in the right place and I can walk isn't too bad! It doesn't even hurt too badly today.

I have not yet tried to put shoes on, but I'm working from home Monday - Thursday so I think I'll wait until I absolutely have to! Looks like I'm going to have to wait on running for a bit.